As a write one thing is for certain. Two weeks from today I will either get killed doing something very stupid, or I will successfully have pulled off one of the stupidest things I have ever done in my life.
For most of my life I have refined the art of not getting credit for any of my accomplishments into a science. Once in a blue moon I would have a change of heart, and decide to place the proverbial horses head in someones bed, but again I would claim no credit. I would ensure that the parties I wanted to demonstrate my skills were aware something was happening. I would tell them the timing of something happening. But I would not tell them what was going to happen, because nothing is more fun than watching a large group of people very surprised with a very small handful suspecting they know who was involved. It's the West Hercegovian in me that makes me do it.
This time, it will be different. I am trying to impress Bosanke (women from Bosnia, Catholic, Orthodox or brandy drinking Muslim), so if I am successful I will be taking credit.
Success will involve timing. I will have to study the environment and examine all the variables in the same manner that the Pink Panthers plan a heist. The key will be spotting the small windows of opportunity when they arise and from examining the patterns to predict with reliability the when the next windows of opportunity will arise. If my instincts are right, suicidal behavior will become merely dangerous. My intuition will be crucial because I will be required to pass the point of no return before the window of opportunity opens.
Am I nuts? Of course I am. I used to smoke cigarettes. My Physician told me that for my physiology tobacco was far more dangerous than cocaine or heroin. On February 25, 2010 I will experience the ultimate adrenaline rush of my life. I wonder what my Physician will have to say about Bosanke?
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